As the Clock is Ticking

The Unbearable Lightness of Being

I’ve been in love. At least I know that. Lost them both, but at least I know that love is real. And I know that you can love someone with all of your heart, but that doesn’t mean you can live with them.

But I’ve never known success. Not real success. Nothing lasting.

Things worked my way a few times, but…it lead to nothing, ultimately.

I would really like to know the taste of success at least once in this life of mine.

Success being…to capture the thing I’ve always wanted. To be published. To make a good living as a writer. To sell my work, then be asked if I had anything more to sell.

Finding my consort would be great, too. A life partner. A friend I can sleep with. That too seems an impossibility. Not sure why. Guess it’s me.

Still haven’t made any friends at Daily Kos, but I know that takes time. It is what it is. It’s a good site, but there is a clannishness about some of the members and I haven’t got the time or the will to kiss their asses and get on their good side.

I’ll be me. I rock. They’ll see that eventually.

Pretty much every day I visit the site I cross paths with a new Liberal Stinker, or some dimwit who didn’t bother to read my comment closely, misinterpreted what I said, then chose to berate me.

It is what it is. I’ll just ignore most of those little fuckers, unless I’m drunk and spoiling for a fight, and one of them makes a wrong move. Then I’ll draw blood.

But all of that’s…not very relevant right now.

I need to get published. I need to find an agent. I need to market my work, and I’ll be damned if I know where to begin.

After all these years I finally have several marketable works, but I’m too brain dead to bait the hook and throw my line into the water. Been adrift at sea for too long.

Anyway…onward….

“…in All the Wrong Places”

Joined Daily Kos a few weeks ago. Since Twitter shit-canned me—twice—without explanation other than a link to their Hadrian’s wall of dreaded, almost meaningless Twitter Rules, I needed some form of interaction. Most of the crew at DK seemed pretty cool, so I thought I’d give it a try.

And they are cool for the most part. Way cool.

But I knew there’d be some flies in the ointment, and there were. It only took a few days for that to pan out.

Fly the First was some naggy old broad from Tesas. I don’t necessarily dislike her, but she has a finger-wagging way about her that annoys me. Our last interchange was about how VA Hospitals suck. She told me they didn’t. Then I posted a link to illustrate the length and breadth of the VA’s suckage. She ended it by saying “Then why don’t you do something about it?”

Nag, nag, nag.

Fly II was some guy who griped at me for using the phrase “indian giver.” I was kind of drunk at the time and thought he was just yanking my chain so I answered as would a frustrated Scottsman in a land that only spoke English.

Fly the Third was some guy who wouldn’t give it up, and basically accused me of being a racist for using that phrase. He also deeply objected to using the word “gypped” because it was originally a slur against Gypsies in Romania hundreds of years ago.

I replied:

You are way off base. When you have to explain the etymology of a slur, it’s probably not as bad as you thought it was, in this case “gypped.”

Regarding “Indian Giver” the picture of a Native American never entered my mind, and I’m sure that’s true for well over 90% of all the people who use it. We think of The Little Rascals or Leave it to Beaver.

You’re just posturing. It’s a piss poor example of the laziest form of Virtue Signaling.

You’re bending over backwards to find offense where none was intended and only scant evidence exists.

(by the way, the thing I called “indian giver” was alcohol, as in the embodiment of alcohol)

He’s a dick I hope I never see him again. He’s a “Liberal Stinker” which was the topic of another “diary” as they call them there. He’s the kind of guy who will work overtime to prove that he is liberal-er, yea, more liberal-er than thou.

I will refrain from using those phrases again, in the future, because I am a liberal, and as such I strive to be considerate to others.

I have to say that thanks to the Liberal Stinkers, we’ve reached a point in this country where it feels like you can’t open your mouth without offending someone.

Fly the Fourth, and the worst of the flies to date, is some dirty piece of shit conservative who weaseled onto the site just so he can fuck with liberals. Apparently he’s been there for years, so he’s always careful to make his jibes just shy of the line of violation.

If you’re not familiar with sites like this, for reasons too many to go into now, they tend to be distinctly bifurcated. Liberal sites are for liberals, and conservative sites are for conservatives.

The cons keep us off their sites because it is ridiculously easy to show, nay, to prove how stupid their arguments are…and they don’t like that.

Liberals keep the cons off of their site because the cons will run around posting disgusting pictures of dog shit and aborted fetuses and, whenever possible, ganging up on a given user and making his life hell…and liberals don’t like that.

Anyway…the very odd thing about the DK boards is that there is no block or mute button. If you cross paths with an idiot or an asshole, there’s no way to not see that person again, so you have to learn to live with it.

Which might be a good thing in the long run.

Not sure yet.

In closing, I went to DK hoping to find some kindred spirits, and thus far I’ve come up short. Even though online bulletin boards and social media sites are better than nothing…and sadly, for millions of us that’s all there is…you’re probably never going to find a true friend there.

You’ll never really find your people.

You’ll just have to keep looking, out there in the real world, on the planet where you’re beginning to suspect you don’t belong.

That’s where it will hurt the most.

But that’s the only place it counts.

No Legacy So Rich….

Behold my third “diary” entry for Daily Kos.

The first was very well received.  240+ recommendations. Made the front page.  Oooo.  BMOC.

The second, not so much.  4 recommendations.  

But it’s a new venue to explore.
Can’t deny that my inner attention whore loves the…what’s it called?
But that’s not the point, and that’s the…seduction of popularity.

Instead of speaking your truth, you’re tempted to say something that people will like. And that messes it all up, because that’s not why we’re here. Well, not entirely why.

Truth is never on our side.
We must stand with the truth, on truth’s side.

The discovery of truth upholds everything about society.  The manipulation of truth undermines it all.  Truth is real.  Verifiable.

Perhaps not repeatable in a laboratory, but the truth is like a rock that you stand on.

The GOP has no regard for truth whatsoever.
This is not hyperbole.
The GOP lies all the time, as do their propagandist media outlets.

Conservatives lie so frequently that if you want to know the truth, just watch one of their shows and whatever they say, believe the opposite, and you’ll probably be right.

One would think it would be easy to beat people like that. It would be, probably, had they not mountains of oil & gas money…and countless billions in kick-backs from arms dealers. Money can proclaim that black is white for a long, long time. Sadly, we seem to have reached the point where people believe it.

***** 

   No fear.

   All of this is passing.
   Holding on to the wind.
   The rock is stupid
   Unless it’s your rock
   Beneath your feet

   Happy happy happy
   Said the sad sad face

   As a setting sun
   Is surely rising
   Tomorrow

   Somewhere

   Happy
   Love
   Security