It Hurts to Die on Twitter

Losing your Twitter account is a lot like dying. It really is. It’s on a much smaller scale, of course, but there’s nothing else to compare it to.

One day, you’re joking around with your friends and scrapping with the schoolyard bullies. The next day you’re gone, and you don’t even know why.

Twitter never gave me a reason for why they suspended my account. The final message from them was a long-winded boilerplate about “Spamming” and that’s it. Not word since. Twitter doesn’t talk to the dead, especially if Twitter is the one who killed them.

Spamming. What is spamming? Isn’t that when you inundate a message board with the exact same message over and over again. And I mean, repeating the same message a lot of times, dozens if not hundreds of times, not just two or three.

I didn’t do that. Not even close.

Pasting the same message, usually commercial, hundreds of times everywhere is what spamming means to most of the world, but not to Twitter.

The reason I hate Jack Dorsey is because Twitter is one of the most poorly managed social media platforms in the world, yet it keeps growing in popularity and Jack just keeps adding another billion dollars to his bank account.

Twitter has also become one of the most essential websites on earth. Not popular, essential. It has reached the point that in order to live and work and integrate with the world, a person has to have a Twitter account in the exact same way that they need a telephone, the internet, or a car.

And yet, Twitter can kick you off for any reason, at any time, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it.

What’s worse is, there’s no consistency. Three people can post the exact same message and the first will get suspended, the second will get a seven-day time out, while the third will get no punishment at all.

I’ve had two accounts suspended now, and I can say in all honesty that I didn’t do anything bad enough to earn a permanent suspension. Take it with a grain of salt. I respect a healthy sense of skepticism.

But I never lied, and I never hurt anyone, and I never asked that anybody be hurt. I was never on the warpath, constantly, like so many of the conservative accounts.

Meanwhile, the liars and the hate-filled assholes with big accounts are safe and sound on Twitter, lying every day, and nothing will ever happen to them.

So I’m dead. Again. I died on Twitter. That world will go on without me, and sadly I probably won’t be missed. I just didn’t have what it takes to be a Twitter star.

Yet, here I am sitting at my computer, in a room filled with art supplies that I rarely used because I was too busy tweeting my precious, unique words into the void of an advertiser’s wet dream.

I don’t have a new life yet…but by God, I will soon.

(coming soon: why don’t anti-trust and monopoly laws apply to big tech like Twitter, Facebook, and Microsoft? Is it because Wall Street, i.e. the rich, prefer it that way because it’s easier for them to maintain control?)